“ For I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you and never to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 When I was 18 years old I moved to California. The big move from all I’ve ever known San Antonio, TX to Los Angeles, CA was because of a dream as a singer and actress. To make it big on the big screen, red carpet and cameras!! Fast forward 9 ½ years later… while still in Los Angeles still going out on auditions and booking them here and there. Also singing engagements with my twin brother. Yet another and matter of fact a bigger dream than making “it big” in the entertainment industry was growing more and more rapidly each year that went by.
That dream was a family. My own. To be a great wife to a great Godly man. The one God has for me. Also to be a great mother. Now here in the present after visiting home in Texas a couple times recently I’ve had this weird feeling and longing to home in Texas. When I’m there I don’t to leave and when I’m in California I want to be home in Texas. I’ve had this for several years and recently made the decision to move back home. The questions started coming all at once… Is this my will or God’s? What am I going to do there? How am I going to make my living? Am I going to give up on acting and singing all together? Also the devil threw a lot of lies in there too lying “ God’s not going to provide for you, God’d not going to take care of you , you don’t have what it takes, people are going to look down on you for coming back home….” I shut that down real quick! But there is a lot of detail to go through especially a move like this. Of course I have to be purposeful yet I’m surrendering all that I desire. I’m looking to God to take care of me and I know that He willl for He said “ I will never leave you nor forsake you”.
Here is what I’m learning this transition season. “Trust in The Lord and do good. Then you will live safely in the land and prosper. Take delight in The Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit everything you do to The Lord. Trust in Him and He will help you.” Psalm 37:3-5 Maybe from reading this it’s not all about the answers to all the questions I listed earlier… But to just trust in The Lord. Me putting my trust in my Father to guide and provide for me and HOW that comes I don’t need to know. The definition of commit means to roll away or put aside. I thought to commit to something is to pursue in but no. In God’s word He says to roll away the fear, the doubt, the worry, the burden, the pressure… Commit everything you do to The Lord. Trust in Him and He will help you. I find it more and more amazing that God cares about us and what is concerning us (Pslams 138:8).
During this time I believe God is saying to me be still my daughter. Let me guide the path where you need to be on and I will get you there but in the mean time BLOOM where you are!!! I love the quote by Charles Spurgeon “God is worth waiting for.” He is. As we wait for Him He works on our behalf. He makes our crooked places straight. He gives us strength in the wait and His joy. As I spend more and more time with Him the Lord has opened a new season of knowing Him in a new way. Can God trust me to trust in Him to take care of me in this transition? All of my hopes and dreams? Yes! Will I commit/roll away everything to God knowing that He knows which path for me is best? Yes! Knowing where I am is not where I want to be but I will get there. “ Trust in The Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, acknowledge Him in all that you do and He will direct your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6
Song: I Surrender All
